A long-time friend of my lifelong best friend, who has two older children and a capable husband, refused to attend a celebration for her due to her responsibilities as a mom. This response was met with suspicion that she was overwhelmed by her responsibilities and responsibilities. The writer suggests that her response suggests there is another underlying resentment behind the extreme response. If you feel there is something to be salvaged from this situation, consider having a conversation about the issue and setting a boundary around where guests can sit at shows in the future. The author suggests that the issue with the upcoming art/craft show and future shows should be separate from the concern about the veteran's cleanliness.